I have been thinking about approval and validation lately. At the heart of it is the conflicting desire to want to show people just how great you are and get their attention with the other part of you that is tired and just wants to be who you are without the need to prove this to anyone . To just be in the state of being and not exhibition. “You are under no obligation to be the same person you were five minutes ago” should be one of my favorite quotes when it comes to living to people’s expectations of me. My expectations of me change regularly, so it’s with great pity that I look upon anyone who takes it upon his or herself to tick the done things on their check lists concerning other people. How have I come up so far? Really. Don’t do that to yourself. This also means that I do not have expectations of others set in stone. Oh, you are not like that anymore? Great! I was rather expecting that. No, it did not take me by surprise. You have changed and it is okay.
I want to able to do things because I really want to do them and take responsibility for my act of doing and not because I want to continue the tradition of doing things that people are already used to seeing me doing. Evolving constantly as time sails along with us should be expected. Life in the end is something personal and brief. Emphasis on ‘personal’. It is left for us to remix it with elements we truly desire, to mold it into something we would enjoy living. What if I gave up writing for a while to stare at old pictures? Will that be okay? In my book, the answer should be ‘yes’. What if I decided that I give up on continuing the series on Romanticism (which I have for a while), will that be okay? Sure. It must be okay in my book. I must feel good about my decisions. They should give me peace of mind first before considering anyone else.
The summary of all approval quotes is this: Don’t seek it. Approve yourself and be Okay with it.