No chill 

I am approaching middle age. 😂😂

At age 22.

Today, we finally installed the wood system( still can’t find the English equivalent for the radiator run on gas, so this is what I’ll call it) I peed in a cup( no, I am not drunk. I really typed this)as well as stayed hungry from morning( well I ate pieces of chicken and two tangerines) till just about two mins ago because the kitchen was occupied with all those work tools. Doesn’t explain the peeing in the cup, right? But at least the hunger explains why I sound a little high. I always do. I remember this hungry time when I went to obudu cattle ranch and ended up turning red towards the evening because everything was hilarious by then. Dehydrated and very high. Hungry high. This is not to mean that whatever I am about to say is unimportant  or anything similar. Well, I’ve been planning this particular blog post since yesterday and seeing I’ve had a slice of bread, I can finally give that pep talk, so grab your seatbelts and look for billy. Billy, my goat. Or read the next paragraph.

I am tired, tired of my newsfeed. So tired I could delete people. In warri style way, but I still remain a pacifist. I think I am one of the few who find it irritating the situation with the Nigerian president. Not the president, but the people. For one time in my entire political career(amen), I feel like holding a placard with #I stand with Buhari. I stand with Aisha and I stand with Buhari, and you heard me right. Unfriend me. Beware of me lol. Let’s get serious.

It is no longer news, I believe that I have unfollowed about 80 percent of my Facebook friends, which leaves about twenty people I read from( don’t take me figures literally) and the rest are pages I check often and this is how I found out that recently, the President of Nigeria made a comment to Angela Merkel, a clapback of some sorts after Aisha Buhari said she might not be campaigning for and with him in the next election. The president said his wife belonged in his living room, his kitchen and bedroom and before you could blink ,ette and mma feminists took this matter up their wrappers. To say I’m annoyed is like putting a moustache on my face and asking me to smile. Actually I am enraged and seeing I and Raheem have been discussing demon possession a lot lately, you might think…

Okay! Back to the matter at hand.First, I have no problem with what mister president said. I really can’t fake that I can see anything misogynistic in his comments. It is very convenient for offended Nigerians to ignore that he said living room and ‘ the other rooms and pick on the kitchen. And no one is pointing out this conditioned bias? Someone said to me that the idea that Aisha has to even belong to a room is offensive. Now that is a valid point I could take into consideration. If we are okay with her belonging to the other rooms and weirdly uncomfortable about the one room; the kitchen, the we are not as honest as we claim to be. 

Today there was a follow up video where the president said he meant what he said in the previous video thereby disappointing Nigerians who felt it was a joke.He said his wife is supposed to take care of him and somehow this has become a bad thing to say. Again, it was very convenient that the journalist did not ask the president if he thinks his function as husband includes taking care of his wife(It is very obvious of course that he is taking care of her and his children whether through legal or corrupt means but these people want a terrible context to find fault in his words) but no, that was left out so we could have a pseudo tragic moment of reflection after watching the video.
For people to want to claim that this man has disregard for his wife is fueled for the need to make their ideas relevant; feminism and the rest, ignoring the interesting facts that this is a Muslim woman who felt comfortable enough to be too revealing about her husband to an extent of almost being antagonistic. Is this behavior of a woman who is being enslaved by kitchen ideology? Does her knowledge of the inner circle of her husbands politics not show that there is intimacy in this relationship. And no, I am not trying to do thatanalysis or claim I know anything about how they really relate with each other but I feel it’s very unfair to turn a blind eye to visible things about this family. Why are we ignoring so many things that classify as nuances; the man’s age, upbringing, hers, pettiness, religion. Really though, are we all going to deny that the religious culture of this man has groomed him to be a man who feels his wife should be his support in ways that again his religion has propagated. This woman is not an oppressed or suppressed woman.Why have people resorted to calling his way of talking slow and imbecilic? Really? Okay, let me say it now, I like how buhari talks. I like how northerners speak. If your only hope to make an argument is to insult the bodily functions and characteristics of a man, you need serious help.

P.S. I am a feminist but I am sick of seeing how everything turns into a feminist debate. Everything is scrutinized in ways that the range of topics for new discussions is almost nonexistent.

So I hear that some people will unfriend each other because they cannot help disagreeing on this matter, and so on. Like Chimananda who most probably would not agree with my ideas on this Buhari issue says regularly, so will I. I am not interested in being liked or disliked because of my ideas on things . If you have a counter argument, share it, but I think I am coming to terms with knowing that one day you might drop low on someone’s scale of reasonable people and maybe this day is my day on yours, but if relationships have to be sustained by such fickle things, then I am disgusted and would rather not waste my energy on someone or people who would easily turn someone off without giving a sound counter argument. And you are not the most important person on earth, neither am I, but the most important person liked me and He likes you too and that’s fine enough for me , so agree or not, but there it is.

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4 responses

  1. Such is the best avoided banal texture of Nigerian tabloids: deliberations over the taxonomy of another man’s personal effect. It engages the idle woman and intrigues her into base chatter while cluttering the airway of the genuinely busy. You for instance, would make a more interesting partner in a discussion whisking, say, demonology. Just for instance; neither of us intends to whisk up malevolent wraiths.

    Another interesting instance would be, perhaps shedding more light on the sparing teaser pertaining to the peeing fiasco. It was like a thrilling movie trailer racing past with the movie title in absentia.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Public office holders do not just speak for themselves. They must weigh everything they say. Tough, yes, but that’s the job. Whichever way I look at it, what Buhari said on an international platform was in bad taste. I will probably not be writing an opinion piece on it or losing my breath over it either.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. No need to say much on this here, but freedom comes with responsibility and with power comes even greater responsibility.
    Nigeria is a delicate society and most things are not as clear as they seem. And most Nigerians are not angry because of a singular statement, it’s the big picture they look at.

    Liked by 1 person

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